Releasing the Old, Intending Something New

At the Unitarian Universalist service in Santa Fe this morning, the last Sunday in 2018, the Rev. Gail Lindsay Marriner lead congregants and guests in a change-of-year exercise inspired by her interpretation of the book The Everything Seed, by Carol Martignacco. She spoke of constant change and development in the cosmos, in the world, in society, and in humans.

As part of change and development, we were urged to contemplate and choose a behavior, a pattern, a situation, an action, or an attitude from this concluding year that we are ready to give up. By relinquishing one thing, we can then release energy to choose a new intent for the coming year.

We each wrote on tissue-thin pieces of paper the things we want to release, and we wrote on sturdier slips of paper the things to intend to do. Then we walked outside and burned the flimsy papers, releasing the old behaviors to the wind. And we pocketed the strips of sturdy paper to use as bookmarks or tuck into a wallet or notebook, that we may come upon them in the new year and check to see how we are doing.

Girlfriends

Sixteen women friends with whom I graduated from Sidney (Ohio) High School in 1965 assembled at the Inn at Cedar Falls this week to celebrate the year of our 70th birthdays and our friendship. You may think that these were my closest friends in high school, but that is not necessarily the case.  They were all classmates, but in a class of about 300. Some of them I had gone to junior high school with, but there were two junior highs in town then, and most had attended the other one. None of these girls were in my elementary school, but some of them had known each other since elementary days. I knew several by virtue of going to the same church back then. And a couple I knew not at all, because they had moved into the school for only the last two years, and our paths had simply not crossed in the course of daily classes or extracurricular activities. I have no clear idea of how I came to be invited to the first meeting of this group, ten years ago in Naples, Florida. A matter of serendipity and knowing some of the right people, I guess. I am glad I went to that first meeting, and though I have missed a couple group events since then, I am glad I went back to this second big celebration.

We had reserved ten of the cottages at the Inn at Cedar Falls, adjacent to Hocking Hills State Park in south central Ohio near the town of Logan. The first surprise was that the cottages were so far away from each other and the lodge where we were to eat and gather--and that the quarter-mile terrain over which we travelled from cottage to gathering point was so hilly! Clearly we had remembered growing up in flatland Ohio. Even the hardiest among us was grateful for the assistance of cars and drivers that could make the trek, especially during the once-only light rain and the three evenings when we all returned after dark. Many of us, however, appreciated the lush greenery and solitude in the early morning, when we could take a cup of coffee onto our balconies and watch the sun rise, or at least listen to the wind before the joint activities of the day commenced.

With seventeen of us, a lot of time each day was spent in discussing who was driving whom where and when...but the discussions were all in good humor and achieved the result of caring for everyone's wishes. Groups left for hikes to Ash Cave, Old Man's Cave, and Cedar Falls. Also shopping at gift and craft places in the area. Some of us explored the little town of Logan, with its restaurants and unique shops. All these excursions gave us time to walk and talk in small groups or one-on-one. We ate as a large group in the Cedar Falls lodge two nights, and had a special prix fixe six-course dinner all together at Glenlaurel the middle night. We had a late afternoon bourbon tasting and book discussion, which lead us into such deep and moving discussion that our hosts had to come fetch us for out 7:30 dinner reservation.

I renewed friendships on this excursion but I also made news friends. We have all reached an age when we have accomplished a lot of different things, made different choices, weathered different crises, and enjoyed different blessings. But we all come from a certain place at a certain time, and it is interesting to see how that common rooting has served us in the years we have spent apart. Gone is any touch of envy or competition or insecurity, I think. What has grown is respect, support, and appreciation for the people we have become as we have each moved through life.

We told stories, we laughed, we sighed, and occasionally we cried through three days together, but it is noteworthy that in spite of personal challenges, we are all upbeat at this stage of our lives. My words cannot explain or describe the feeling of camaraderie we have developed. Thursday morning we met for breakfast and laughed again and hugged, and started planning for our next get-together. There is no doubt that it will happen.

Spring Forward Smørrebrød

This was my nod to the all-too-premature "spring forward" Daylight Saving Time command last night--a spring-like addition to our regular Saturday evening Danish smørrebrød, simply because I happened to have fresh asparagus in the house. Asparagus is not a usual accompaniment to Danish open-faced sandwiches, though it does appear occasionally on ham with Italian salad, I now recall. But it is not usual with us, since we concentrate more on good, healthy herring (shown here in the five smaller tidbits circling the spring sandwich).

We washed down our five different herring and the spinach-egg-tomato-asparagus-shrimp-dill mayonnaise concoction with a less healthy Carlsberg beer and aquavit. It was delicious, as always. I have been doing some thinking this weekend about the distinction between a habit, a tradition, and a ritual. A habit is done regularly, but without thinking. A tradition has been done before--a few times anyway--and tends to acquire meaning in the fact of being handed down. A ritual is also performed on a regular basis and has meaning; it is ceremonial and, according to Merriam-Webster, has "religious, courtly, social, or tribal significance."

I have been making smørrebrød for almost fifty years. It wasn't until we lived in Spain and had easy access to the ingredients (yes, Spain) that we started to enjoy it every week. Now, back in Cincinnati, we also have easy access to many, though not all, ingredients (bless Ikea and Jungle Jim's). Our Saturday evening dinners go beyond habit to tradition and ritual.

Turning the clocks forward or backward is just an annoying habit.

Happy New Year!

We were part of a Chinese New Year's celebration last night, hosted by a couple who have recently returned from spending six years in China. It was a gala evening of wine, "real" Chinese food, a slide show of pictures, and good conversation.

Only once before have I celebrated Chinese New Year. That was many years--decades--ago, in Boston, when we went to a parade in Boston's Chinatown with some Danish friends. It was colorful, but not as elaborate as the parades and fireworks I saw on TV yesterday. I remember that the weather was very cold. Perhaps we topped off the afternoon with a visit to Joyce Chen's Cambridge restaurant. Joyce Chen pioneered Chinese cooking in the U.S. She had a cooking program on WGBH, the public television station in Boston, which aired in 1966-67, after the better-known Julia Child had begun to teach America how to cook French. Joyce Chen was the first TV cooking chef I knew, as I was still living in Ohio in the early 1960s when The French Chef began broadcasting, from Boston but not all they way to small-town Ohio.

The New Year's celebration last night was in a warmer locale, and the food was better than I remembered from Joyce Chen's restaurant, when I had been surprised by very sticky white rice. For one thing, we had the option of brown rice last night, in addition to the traditional white (but less sticky). With the rice we had an egg and tomato dish, which our hosts explained had been their regular Monday night dinner while in China, because that was what their housekeeper prepared. It reminded me a bit of the Egg Foo Yung that had been featured on one of the episodes of the Joyce Chen program that I had seen during my early married years, but the egg was fluffier and there was lots of tomato, which was an ingredient that I don't recall Chen using, and which I don't think I've seen in American Chinese restaurants.

Prior to the egg, tomato, and rice we enjoyed a delicious cold salad of diced cucumber and carrot with boiled whole peanuts, with a nice dressing that could be spiced up with various sauces. Most cuisines have a cucumber salad, I have learned, but this may be the best I have ever tasted. It probably would not be bad with garbanzo beans instead of the peanuts, but less authentic, I suppose. It would also make a refreshing main dish summer salad.

After the rice and egg we made dumplings, a traditional Chinese New Year food, we were told. Some of us made them, that is. I just watched, sampled, and observed a handy little plastic dumpling press that the hostess told me she had found at the CAM International Market in Cincinnati, a giant supermarket that I had stumbled upon and previously walked through in awe, but where I had been too unprepared to buy anything. Now I have a mission: that dumpling press is the perfect gadget I need to make mini-empanadas for an Argentine meal.

We had been warned that the Chinese don't do good wine, so I went prepared to stick to the Chinese beer that had been promised instead. But our host had found wine with labels depicting roosters, and since we were entering the Year of the Rooster, that was a good enough excuse to offer wine as well and still be in the spirit of China.

The Rooster is one of the twelve zodiac signs of the Chinese calendar and connotes fidelity and punctuality. That "punctuality" characteristic would prove that I am not born in any year of the rooster. Rather, I discovered, I was born in the year of the pig, which suggests a whole host of characteristics that are not particularly pleasing to me.  The best that can be said for the year of the pig is that it behaves itself and wishes no harm to others. Therefore I will refrain from any further comments on the Chinese zodiac.

Epiphany

I remember that it was an epiphany for me a few years ago when I realized that the serious Christian holiday of Epiphany coincided with the Spanish holiday of Three Kings Day, the day on which Spanish children received their Christmas gifts, brought by the Three Kings, not Santa Claus.

The Three Kings, or Three Wise Men, had to go on a long journey to get to the baby Jesus after they heard he had been born in Bethlehem. It took them 12 days--the Twelve Days of Christmas. Ah, suddenly all these yuletide references are coming together.

I loved the Spanish star, which showed motion from one point to another, where it hung over Bethlehem to show the way for the Wise Men. It was featured in all the belenes (the Bethlehems),  elaborate Christmas village scenes that were the centerpiece of each town's Christmas celebrations (no worries about celebrating a religious holiday on government grounds here).

I also loved the tradition of not having to have all Christmas decorations down by January 1st. Since Three Kings Day falls on January 6, and that's when the Three Kings come to deliver gifts, it is perfectly acceptable to have Christmas decorations up through January 6.

So now I have begun thinking of January 6th as the day that I should start thinking about taking down Christmas decorations. And since it fell on Friday this year, I figured I would have the weekend to remove traces of yuletide from my house. But we had gotten only a few decorations up this year, since we were doing a major kitchen renovation, which somehow seems to spill over into the rest of the house--at least the first floor--and we got them up late. And then we had an unexpected event on Friday that demanded attention through Sunday. So here I am Sunday evening two days after Epiphany, and the decorations are still up. I'll get to them tomorrow, maybe. Well, probably not, since I will be out all day. Tuesday, then.

But then there is the Danish Christmas song:

"Julen varer lige til Påske."   [Christmas lasts until Easter.]

So I still have time. And the julenisser (Christmas elves) can stay nestled on the mantle for another day or two.

The Endorsement of the Century

© 2016 Cincinnati Enquirer 

When I moved back to Ohio two years ago after spending my entire adult life elsewhere, I knew I was moving to an area that was more conservative politically than any of the places I had lived since I grew up in the state in the 1950s and early 1960s.

The best news I had this week was the surprise announcement that the Cincinnati Enquirer had endorsed Hillary Clinton for president of the United States. It is truly the endorsement of the century--the Enquirer editorial board has not endorsed another Democratic candidate since 1914. The long, well-reasoned, and yes, conservative, statement is here. It bears thoughtful reading by all.

And if you are interested in how the team at the Enquirer came to their decision, and why it is even important for newspapers to endorse candidates in this day and age, you can find out in this video presentation.

Fourth of July

Independence Day dawned dark and rainy today in Cincinnati and the weather did not improve dramatically throughout the day. But the rain did stop in time for us to drive to a pleasant outing with friends, thankfully held indoors. We had a delicious luncheon with traditional and new foods: shrimp kebabs, baked beans, dill and lemon potato salad, and romaine. Great conversation, deepening friendships with acquaintances made in the last year, and meeting new people.

Before we left for lunch, I located the Declaration of Independence and re-read it on this, its 240th birthday. You can, too. Here it is from the National Archives. It's a good reminder of the purpose of government and the goals to which we say we aspire. Not to mention the long list of transgressions which caused our split from Great Britain in the first place. Contrary to opinion from some folk, we are nowhere near that level of treachery at this point in our history.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The Declaration of Independence: A Transcription

IN CONGRESS, July 4, 1776.

The unanimous Declaration of the thirteen united States of America,

When in the Course of human events, it becomes necessary for one people to dissolve the political bands which have connected them with another, and to assume among the powers of the earth, the separate and equal station to which the Laws of Nature and of Nature's God entitle them, a decent respect to the opinions of mankind requires that they should declare the causes which impel them to the separation.

We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.--That to secure these rights, Governments are instituted among Men, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed, --That whenever any Form of Government becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of the People to alter or to abolish it, and to institute new Government, laying its foundation on such principles and organizing its powers in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect their Safety and Happiness. Prudence, indeed, will dictate that Governments long established should not be changed for light and transient causes; and accordingly all experience hath shewn, that mankind are more disposed to suffer, while evils are sufferable, than to right themselves by abolishing the forms to which they are accustomed. But when a long train of abuses and usurpations, pursuing invariably the same Object evinces a design to reduce them under absolute Despotism, it is their right, it is their duty, to throw off such Government, and to provide new Guards for their future security.--Such has been the patient sufferance of these Colonies; and such is now the necessity which constrains them to alter their former Systems of Government. The history of the present King of Great Britain is a history of repeated injuries and usurpations, all having in direct object the establishment of an absolute Tyranny over these States. To prove this, let Facts be submitted to a candid world.

He has refused his Assent to Laws, the most wholesome and necessary for the public good.
He has forbidden his Governors to pass Laws of immediate and pressing importance, unless suspended in their operation till his Assent should be obtained; and when so suspended, he has utterly neglected to attend to them.
He has refused to pass other Laws for the accommodation of large districts of people, unless those people would relinquish the right of Representation in the Legislature, a right inestimable to them and formidable to tyrants only.
He has called together legislative bodies at places unusual, uncomfortable, and distant from the depository of their public Records, for the sole purpose of fatiguing them into compliance with his measures.
He has dissolved Representative Houses repeatedly, for opposing with manly firmness his invasions on the rights of the people.
He has refused for a long time, after such dissolutions, to cause others to be elected; whereby the Legislative powers, incapable of Annihilation, have returned to the People at large for their exercise; the State remaining in the mean time exposed to all the dangers of invasion from without, and convulsions within.
He has endeavoured to prevent the population of these States; for that purpose obstructing the Laws for Naturalization of Foreigners; refusing to pass others to encourage their migrations hither, and raising the conditions of new Appropriations of Lands.
He has obstructed the Administration of Justice, by refusing his Assent to Laws for establishing Judiciary powers.
He has made Judges dependent on his Will alone, for the tenure of their offices, and the amount and payment of their salaries.
He has erected a multitude of New Offices, and sent hither swarms of Officers to harrass our people, and eat out their substance.
He has kept among us, in times of peace, Standing Armies without the Consent of our legislatures.
He has affected to render the Military independent of and superior to the Civil power.
He has combined with others to subject us to a jurisdiction foreign to our constitution, and unacknowledged by our laws; giving his Assent to their Acts of pretended Legislation:
For Quartering large bodies of armed troops among us:
For protecting them, by a mock Trial, from punishment for any Murders which they should commit on the Inhabitants of these States:
For cutting off our Trade with all parts of the world:
For imposing Taxes on us without our Consent:
For depriving us in many cases, of the benefits of Trial by Jury:
For transporting us beyond Seas to be tried for pretended offences
For abolishing the free System of English Laws in a neighbouring Province, establishing therein an Arbitrary government, and enlarging its Boundaries so as to render it at once an example and fit instrument for introducing the same absolute rule into these Colonies:
For taking away our Charters, abolishing our most valuable Laws, and altering fundamentally the Forms of our Governments:
For suspending our own Legislatures, and declaring themselves invested with power to legislate for us in all cases whatsoever.
He has abdicated Government here, by declaring us out of his Protection and waging War against us.
He has plundered our seas, ravaged our Coasts, burnt our towns, and destroyed the lives of our people.
He is at this time transporting large Armies of foreign Mercenaries to compleat the works of death, desolation and tyranny, already begun with circumstances of Cruelty & perfidy scarcely paralleled in the most barbarous ages, and totally unworthy the Head of a civilized nation.
He has constrained our fellow Citizens taken Captive on the high Seas to bear Arms against their Country, to become the executioners of their friends and Brethren, or to fall themselves by their Hands.
He has excited domestic insurrections amongst us, and has endeavoured to bring on the inhabitants of our frontiers, the merciless Indian Savages, whose known rule of warfare, is an undistinguished destruction of all ages, sexes and conditions.

In every stage of these Oppressions We have Petitioned for Redress in the most humble terms: Our repeated Petitions have been answered only by repeated injury. A Prince whose character is thus marked by every act which may define a Tyrant, is unfit to be the ruler of a free people.

Nor have We been wanting in attentions to our Brittish brethren. We have warned them from time to time of attempts by their legislature to extend an unwarrantable jurisdiction over us. We have reminded them of the circumstances of our emigration and settlement here. We have appealed to their native justice and magnanimity, and we have conjured them by the ties of our common kindred to disavow these usurpations, which, would inevitably interrupt our connections and correspondence. They too have been deaf to the voice of justice and of consanguinity. We must, therefore, acquiesce in the necessity, which denounces our Separation, and hold them, as we hold the rest of mankind, Enemies in War, in Peace Friends.

We, therefore, the Representatives of the united States of America, in General Congress, Assembled, appealing to the Supreme Judge of the world for the rectitude of our intentions, do, in the Name, and by Authority of the good People of these Colonies, solemnly publish and declare, That these United Colonies are, and of Right ought to be Free and Independent States; that they are Absolved from all Allegiance to the British Crown, and that all political connection between them and the State of Great Britain, is and ought to be totally dissolved; and that as Free and Independent States, they have full Power to levy War, conclude Peace, contract Alliances, establish Commerce, and to do all other Acts and Things which Independent States may of right do. And for the support of this Declaration, with a firm reliance on the protection of divine Providence, we mutually pledge to each other our Lives, our Fortunes and our sacred Honor.

The 56 signatures on the Declaration appear in the positions indicated:

Column 1
Georgia:
   Button Gwinnett
   Lyman Hall
   George Walton

Column 2
North Carolina:
   William Hooper
   Joseph Hewes
   John Penn
South Carolina:
   Edward Rutledge
   Thomas Heyward, Jr.
   Thomas Lynch, Jr.
   Arthur Middleton

Column 3
Massachusetts:
John Hancock
Maryland:
Samuel Chase
William Paca
Thomas Stone
Charles Carroll of Carrollton
Virginia:
George Wythe
Richard Henry Lee
Thomas Jefferson
Benjamin Harrison
Thomas Nelson, Jr.
Francis Lightfoot Lee
Carter Braxton

Column 4
Pennsylvania:
   Robert Morris
   Benjamin Rush
   Benjamin Franklin
   John Morton
   George Clymer
   James Smith
   George Taylor
   James Wilson
   George Ross
Delaware:
   Caesar Rodney
   George Read
   Thomas McKean

Column 5
New York:
   William Floyd
   Philip Livingston
   Francis Lewis
   Lewis Morris
New Jersey:
   Richard Stockton
   John Witherspoon
   Francis Hopkinson
   John Hart
   Abraham Clark

Column 6
New Hampshire:
   Josiah Bartlett
   William Whipple
Massachusetts:
   Samuel Adams
   John Adams
   Robert Treat Paine
   Elbridge Gerry
Rhode Island:
   Stephen Hopkins
   William Ellery
Connecticut:
   Roger Sherman
   Samuel Huntington
   William Williams
   Oliver Wolcott
New Hampshire:
   Matthew Thornton

Page URL: http://www.archives.gov/exhibits/charters/declaration_transcript.html

U.S. National Archives & Records Administration
8601 Adelphi Road, College Park, MD, 20740-6001, • 1-86-NARA-NARA • 1-866-272-6272

Faces of Cincinnati

This has been a week spent largely beyond our dwelling place in the city of Springdale in north Cincinnati. In spite of our location adjoining a somewhat dated Latino shopping center, with an Hispanic and a Halal grocery store, and a Mexican restaurant, the feel of our neighborhood, and our experience, is distinctly white suburban. This week brought us welcome interchanges with the world beyond.

Impromptu dancing with men and women at World Refugee Day.

On Wednesday we went to Saint Francis de Sales parish on Madison Road near downtown Cincinnati, to participate with others from The Gathering at Northern Hills in preparing and serving a hot lunch to elementary school students who are members of the UpSpring of Cincinnati summer camp enrichment program for homeless children. I am not used to cooking in quantities of 100s, so it's a good thing that I was not in charge of the menu and planning. But I did enjoy chopping more onions that I every had before in a single stretch for sloppy goes, stirring one of six pots of the mixture, and then preparing the plates for the sloppy joes, cole slaw, and tortilla chips. It had been busy with adults  in the kitchen from 10-12, but when the kids came into the dining area after their morning activities, the activity level skyrocketed, as did the decibel level. I went out to check some of the kids in the dining room later in case they wanted seconds, and it was hard hearing above the roar of the crown, even though any child that wanted individual attention from adults stood patiently with hand raised in air to attract attention from one of the teachers or volunteers. We heard details about the work of UpSpring, which sadly has increased the number of people it serves during the summer months in the seven years that this congregation has been performing this service. Shockingly more than  half of all children living in Greater Cincinnati live below the poverty line.

A very young attendee at World Refugee Day.

Friday morning I made a quick stop at the Northminster Presbyterian Church in Finneytown, catching a group of adult refugees at the tail end of their weekly English and citizenship classes, sponsored by Heartfelt Tidbits, a relatively new local non-profit organization that concentrates its efforts on refugee resettlement. I spoke with the executive director, and I am hoping to start some tutoring of adults in this program in the upcoming summer weeks.

Saturday was World Refugee Day, and Catholic Charities Southwestern Ohio had planned a festive event for the refugee families it serves. My volunteer efforts there included the making and sharing of a Vietnamese chicken-cabbage salad and a late pot of South African yellow spiced rice--both these in more customary sized quantities, for a couple families. There were lots of volunteers and lots of other food offerings, too, and some beautiful music and dancing. The large majority of the refugees to Cincinnati now are from Bhutan., but several African and Asian regions are represented. One of the unique experiences I had Saturday as I helped staff the soft drinks table was to hear the Nepali national song and see it interpreted in a graceful dance.

So much joy and grace in this dance! Smiling faces all around!

Celebrating Phil Henry

I spent this afternoon with many others celebrating the life of my dear brother-in-law Phil Henry, who died March 14 of weak kidneys and a strong will. He asked me to read these words at his memorial service, and I was honored to comply.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

As I write this, I'm 80 years old and know that the pages of my life's book have mostly been written….and when you hear these words, the last page will have been written.

To my family and friends present today, I say "hello" and "goodbye."  I'm sure the irony does not escape you.

First, thank you for being my friends; thank you for being my family.  Each of you has played an important part in the mosaic of my life. 

There are others who have already died; many who have been very important to me.  A double posthumous thanks to:

Debbie,

Big T and Pat,

Rich,

Lee,

Pete,

my sister Marlee,

and so many others who enriched my life.

I'd like to share with you a few of my feelings about life and death. 

Richard Feynman, arguably one of the greatest theoretical physicists of the 20th century, said on his deathbed,

"We are lost in this mysterious universe that has no purpose, which is the way it really is as far as I can tell.  It doesn't frighten me." 

This thought has always resonated with me.

My life has been mostly rewarding, and I want you to know that the main reason for that is my wife Nancy.  She has shared with me most all of the wonderful texture of living.  She has been the love of my life.

I have been fortunate:

I have loved and been loved.

I have experienced victory and defeat.

I have marveled at the natural world.

I have traveled to exotic places on our earth and have had a glimpse of other cultures.

I have lived through different time periods--I call it time travel--and if you think that the 1930s, 1940s, and 1950s weren't a different world from the 21st century, think again.

I've said goodbye to all those things now.  I have no illusion about going to "a better (or worse) place." 

I feel lucky to have been able to appreciate on earth the things that, for me, create the proverbial heaven:

A good laugh

The changing seasons

Good music

Nature in all her aspects

Companionship and love

Curiosity

A fine meal.

All who have known me are aware that I think music is transformational. . . 

My Easter Birthday

Easter 1951: Susan Nicklet, Mary (Lewis) Nicklet (mother), and Nancy Nicklet.
Photographed in all likelihood by Robert Nicklet (father).

Here I am in 1951--four years old. The back of the photograph says that it is Easter, and my sister Nancy and I are definitely looking at our Easter baskets from that year, though we don't seem overly impressed. Easter Sunday in 1951, I have just verified, fell on March 25, so I must have actually been four years old minus two days for this picture. I believe the photo must have been taken in the living room of our house on Chestnut Street in Sidney, Ohio, a house of which I have only a handful of real, lasting  memories, for we moved from that home to a new house on Campbell Road within a year or so. 

It was probably a few years later, when I became school age, that I learned that Easter was a movable holiday, dependent on natural forces and religious traditions that I did not understand. Easter did not come again in March until 1959, when it fell on March 29--two days after my birthday. Perhaps it was that year that I found a table that showed when Easter Sunday would fall for years in the future.  It was not as easy then as looking on the Internet. I wanted to find out if my birthday, March 27, would ever coincide with Easter Sunday in my lifetime.

Over the years I forgot the answer, because it wasn't going to happen for a long, long time. This year, Easter Sunday coincided with my birthday--for the first time, I thought--but when I went back to the Easter calendar, I discovered that it had happened once before, as recently as 2005. 

I have no recollection of the 2005 birthday and Easter. We were living in Spain then, in Roquetas de Mar. It was before I started writing my blog Sundays in Spain, and before I had found the handy-dandy Spanish agendas that I used as a datebook and diary (starting in 2006, I discovered to my chagrin when I went looking for them today). Perhaps this was the year that we went to some of the traditional Spanish Semana Santa observances in our small town, or maybe we took a bike ride along the seacoast to Aguadulce that day. At any rate, I am sure that "we" were just my husband and myself, none of my birth family.

Yesterday I was blessed to be in the heart of family; my three sisters and cousins Kathy and Katy and John all assembled at Nancy's for a lovely spring luncheon of quiche, hearty salads, eggs, angel food birthday cake and fruit, and a bunch of other extras, too. Nancy brought forth a handful of old family photos, mostly of her and myself. One was the print of the digitized photo above, now 65 years old. I remember that when as a child I first checked on Easter dates and learned when Easter would fall on my birthday, I had thought, "But I'll be an old lady by then!"

So I guess by my older standard I was an old lady yesterday, and am an even older one today! But I am not yet as old as I will be the next time Easter falls on my birthday: 2027. Now, there is a propitious year for a March 27 Easter birthday. And if I make it that far--I probably will be an old lady by then. 

The Mind Set To Rhythm

Two members of the Cincinnati-based music group The Mind Set To Rhythm did a marvelous thing yesterday. They came to sing and play a private farewell concert for my dear brother-in-law Phil in the hospice facility where he has been since last Monday.

Just two weeks ago three members of the group had shown up at St. John's Unitarian Universalist Church to play "Lady Bird," a modern jazz classic by Tadd Dameron, specially requested by Phil, as the offertory. Phil knows a lot about jazz and its intricate structures, and loves it, and this was the way he chose to say thank you and farewell to the church friends who had been a special part of his life for the last several years. In addition to "Lady Bird" that Sunday, we were treated to Cole Porter's  "Night and Day" after the service, and that got the entire congregation up dancing.

Yesterday there was no dancing, but Will played on the keyboard and Molly sang "All of You," "Embraceable You,"  and "My Funny Valentine," and concluded again with "Night and Day." Phil enjoyed the music more than the lyrics of most pieces, but the lyrics of these classic love songs seemed particularly poignant at this time. Nancy held Phil's hand, while he and Abie (their lovable and loving bundle of dog fur) snuggled quietly together. It truly seemed that Phil could hear the music, and once or twice his feet fluttered on the bedsheets as if in dance.

I had intended to link the songs to their lyrics or to a suitable video, but after much exploration I could not choose among the numerous renditions of these classics. Just as well, as probably no version could compare to the feeling in Phil's room yesterday as a lovely young couple sang for my sister and her husband as they approached the "till death do us part" part of the vows they had made together nearly 40 years earlier.

And I have been playing with the words of the band, The Mind Set To Rhythm. Phil had an incredible mind that he often set to music and rhythm (yesterday we were still trying to figure out his explanation of the "flatted fifth," and Molly helped us). Just as often he set his mind to the question of time and quantum physics, as well as a myriad of other interests, occasionally including history and the social studies that he taught for many years. And as the end approached he set his mind with determination and marched onward, and we are all the richer for having shared a piece of the journey with him.

Celebrating Leap Day

A story for children of all ages, by Hans Christian Andersen

Hans Christian Andersen, 1805-1875

Once upon a time, the days of the week wanted to cut loose, get together, and have a party. Every day was so busy that throughout the year they never had any free time left over; they needed a whole day. And  then they realized they had one every four years: Leap Day, which is added to February every leap year to keep order in the calendar.

So they decided to get together on February 29 for the party, and since February is also the month of Mardi Gras and Carnival, they decided to show up in carnival costumes of their own choice and inclination. They would eat well, drink well, make speeches, and tell each other the good and the bad in open friendship. In the old days, the Vikings tossed gnawed bones at each others’ heads during a banquet; the days of the week, on the other hand, would pelt each other with puns and sharp satire, all in the innocent spirit of carnival fun.

Leap day came, and so did the days of the week.

Sunday, the chairman of the days, showed up in black silk. Pious people might think that he was dressed as a minister going to church, but the worldly saw that he was dressed in festive garb to go out on the town, and that the red carnation he had in his button hole was a symbol of the little red light that they turn on at the theater ticket box to indicate that a performance has no empty seats: “All sold out! Now be sure to have a good time, everyone!”

Monday, a young person and a relative of Sunday, and very fun-loving, followed behind. He left work, he said, at the changing of the guard. “I must go out to hear the music of Offenbach,” he said. “It doesn’t go to my head or to my heart; it tickles my leg muscles, and then I must dance, have some drinks, get a black eye, sleep it off, and then go back to work the next day. I am the youngster in the week.”

Tuesday is the day of the bull, the day of strength. “Yes, that’s me,” said Tuesday. “I do my work with a firm hand. I put Mercury’s wings on the shopkeepers’ boots, see that the factory wheels are well-oiled and turning, make sure that the tailor is sitting at his bench and the street repairmen are repairing the streets. Everyone does his job! I oversee everything, and that is why I am dressed in a police uniform and call myself Polituesday. If that is a bad pun, you try to find one that is better!”

“Now  it’s my turn,” said Wednesday. “I stand in the middle of the week. The Germans call me Herr Mittwoch (Mr. Midweek).  I stand as the floorwalker in the shop, like a flower in between the other honorable days of the week. When we all march together I have three days in front of me and three days behind me; it’s like an honor guard. I just have to believe that I am the most esteemed day in the week.”

Thursday came dressed as a copper smith with a hammer and copper kettle, the symbols of his noble descent. “I am of the highest birth. Pagan and divine.  In the northern European countries I am named for Thor, and in the southern countries for Jupiter. They both knew how to thunder and lighten, and this remains in the family!” Then he banged on his copper kettle to show his great nobility.

Friday was dressed as a young girl and called herself Freya, and also sometimes Venus (it depends on which language was used in whatever country she happened to be in). She was usually quiet and mild, she said, but today she was smart and lively. After all it was leap day, and that frees women. So she can dare, according to the old custom, to take the initiative to propose and not wait to be proposed to.

Saturday turned up as an old housekeeper with broom and cleaning supplies. Her favorite dish was beer and bread porridge, but she didn’t insist, at this festive occasion, that it be set on the table for everyone, just for her. And she got it.

Then the days of the week took their places at the table.

Now all seven have been presented for a family tableau. We give them here simply as a jest in February, the only month that has an extra day.

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Hans Christian Andersen (1805-1875) was a prolific Danish author in many genres, but is known today mostly for his tales told to children. This is one of the lesser-known of the 212 eventyrer. “Ugedagene” was published in 1872; the first mentions of the story in Andersen’s diary are in March of 1868, a leap year. Translated from the Danish by Susanne Bjørner with reference to an English translation by Jean Hersholt (1886-1956).

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